


I'm Borderline Happy, and Borderline Sad

by tothemoonpenguin



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Homophobic Language, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Multi, Other, might be triggering to some people
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-14
Updated: 2016-07-16
Packaged: 2018-07-23 22:18:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7482048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tothemoonpenguin/pseuds/tothemoonpenguin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Small snippets of D&P's life before and after Dan's death. Title is from Borderline by Tove Styrke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so I'm trying to start a series and it might fail but here you go.
> 
> I do not own Dan and Phil in any way and I pay my respect to the families and friends if people who have lost people to any type of terminal illness.
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

Phil was running. 

Some homophobes at school had cornered him in an empty hallway by himself. Most of the teachers were gone and the only one was the PE teacher, hence the reason why they were still at school. 

Phil didn't know what they would do if they caught him, but it certainly wasn't comfort and sing him a lullaby to sleep like his mother used to do.

He turned a sharp corner and then ran into another dark alleyway which he thought had another end to it.

He had thought wrong. 

They were getting closer and Phil was scared for his life. Most people who were homophobic weren't exactly cuddling someone like Phil.

"No turning back now, fag."

"No!" he screamed ducking into a small ball.

...

"Phil, wake up!" a warm voice awoke him.

Phil was in a cold sweat as he felt warm hands guarding him from the cold weather outside.

"It was just a dream," he comforted in a loving tone, "You're okay now."

He felt like autumn and his touch was lighting his insides with violent butterflies. Phil remembered that this was Dan, his beginning, his end, his everything. Dan was his protector and mediator. He was the water Phil relied on.

"I love you so much." Phil stated in a sure voice.

"I love you too," Dan said,

"When I'm gone remember to take care of yourself, okay? Remember that I love you and just because I'm not there doesn't mean that you're nothing. You are amazing and deserve a chance to be happy."

"What-" Phil was cut off as Dan's warmth began to fade.

"Bye, Phil."

...

Phil's eyes flew open. 

He was in his room. The same room that he and Dan had filmed together in for a countless number of years for 'Phil is not on fire'. This was where they had laid on the nights that Dan couldn't sleep and they talked about absolutely nothing and everything from dusk to dawn.

This is also where Phil spent his last days with Dan. He had Leukaemia and a number of days. It was terminal illness. Of course it was hard to deal with. 

That dream had just fired the thirst for Dan. 

...

Phil decided to actually do something today besides lone in he and Dan's apartment. He and Dan's. When he was still alive.

He decided to buy groceries. Hell, maybe he could even progress in this pointless life he was living! That would actually get some work done for once.

Phil walked into Tesco with a imaginary thundercloud floating above his head and money in his back left pocket.

What? Description is the key isn't it?

He grabbed a shopping cart which he probably didn't need, and started pushing it towards the dairy aisle. The store was a bit small and was more like a corner store than a regular grocery store for some reason.

He grabbed the first milk carton he saw and put it inside the cart.

Next, he needed cereal.

"Sir, do you need any help there?" A polite voice asked from the front of the store.

"Uh- no thanks anyway." he stuttered.

"Okay. Tell me if you need any help."

Phil honestly needed the help but he really wasn't into the mood. He just woke up from having a dream of his boyfriend who had died over three years ago, and he still was haunted over.

Fuck this. Who needs cereal when he can just order takeout and not speak to any humans for the rest of his life?

He decides to take the milk just in case.

Phil walked up to the counter with a sad empty cart except for the milk carton.

The boy looked around to be in his early twenties. He had a few tattoos and one caught Phil's eye. It was of cat whiskers on his left wrist. 

_Dan._

His beginning, his end, his everything.

"Hey, aren't you AmazingPhil from back in 2020?" the boy asked, "I was a fan, I remember." he replied to himself without Phil answering.

"Yes I am." Phil answered unwillingly.

A quick awkward silence was in between them until the boy, which  his name tag wrote 'Alec', interrupted.

"We all miss him too, you know? You're not the only one. The only reason I got this tattoo," he said pointing to his left wrist, "Is because you guys made me so happy."

Phil let out a sob.

"The milk is on me. Honestly, I love milk so much I think I'm udderly in love." he said with a cheeky smile on his face. "Come on, I'm off right now. We can go to the park and talk about things that we need to let out." Alec stated.

"O-ok."

...

 

 


	2. Something New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first time that Dan and Phil met and their feelings about the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not in anyway own D&P. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Dan was nervously waiting for the tube to stop in Manchester. He and AmazingPhil, his absolute favourite person, had been chatting for a while now. They lived about three hours away from each other, so they were finally meeting in person today.

Dan's parents weren't exactly happy when they heard that instead of going to college after school, he was going to meet a stranger whom he met online and is four years older than him.

It freaked Dan out if he was being honest.

The train stopped and Dan's nerves began to maximise with anxiety.

He was about to meet Phil. The same person from all the happy videos of his, and the late night Skype calls.

The doors of the train slid open and Dan stepped out. There were so many people coming out that he couldn't see anything except a flurry of colors. 

"Dan!" a familiar voice called.

Dan looked over to where it was coming from, and saw Phil. He was so happy. In fact, so happy that he impulsively decided to run up to Phil and squeeze him into a hug. Dan let go of him, and started to nervously ramble out a long apology-

"Oh I'm so sorry I know we just met but I just really like your videos and you no never mind I sound like a stalker, just please don't hate me I was just really happy and-" 

Phil laughed.

"I'm really happy too, you just caught me off guard. a it's fine Dan." Phil explained as he went in to hug Dan.

"Okay, let's go because I'm going to show you around part of the city. Then later at night we can go on the Manchester Eye. It's going to be so much fun!" Phil squealed.

... 

(A/N; time skip because I can.)

Dan and Phil both walked to the Manchester Eye.

Earlier, Phil showed his apartment to Dan, they played Mario Kart for a while, went to Starbucks, and now they were about to go on the Manchester Eye.

It looked magical as if a unicorn decided that it was so special that the unicorn would puke on it. It doesn't have to make sense.

There were not many people waiting, since there was only other elderly couple.

Phil was about to give the right amount to pay the worker when she interrupted him.

"No, don't worry, there's not that many people here anyway." the woman said in a polite and giving tone.

"Thanks." Dan and Phil chorused.

"No problem." she smlied.

Dan walked up to carrier number nine, and sat down on one side.

"Come on, Phil!" Dan called.

Phil went inside and sat down on the opposite side.

"Ready?" Phil questioned Dan.

"Yes, I'm excited!" Dan said excitedly as if he was a little kid on Christmas Day.

The ride started and it went kept on slowly.

"This is magical." Dan whispered.

When Dan turned to look at Phil, he was face to face with him. Phil's eyes flickered down to Dan's lips and Dan leaned in.

"Is this okay?" Phil whispered.

Dan closed the gap between them and he felt at home as their lips locked in a dance emotion. Dan smiled against Phil's lips and whispered, 

"Of course it is." he laughed.

As their lips came together again, they both were thinking,

This is the start of something new.

...


End file.
